Neediness

Twice this week I have expressed feeling needy to two wonderful humans and friends.  We are only on day three and it's happened two times already.  I hate feeling needy.  I'm left in a vulnerable position when I'm needy.  I hate being vulnerable.  It makes me feel weak.  I hate being weak because it exposes my neediness.  On and on in this detrimental circle we go. 

Often I stifle my neediness, pretend it does not exist, justify why I should not be feeling it.  It forces me to recognize what I need.  It forces me to face myself.  It forces me to know I am not completely self-sufficient.

When I ignore my neediness, my needs, I'm essentially saying I am not important enough have them met. I'm essentially invalidating part of my humanity.

To be human is to be needy.

Today, I needed food and water and warmth and sleep.
Today, I needed affirmation and love and encouragement and laughter and hope.
Today, I needed mercy and forgiveness and grace and salvation.
Today, I needed other people.
Today, I needed Christ.

Every day, I need these and so much more.  My every need cannot be met on my own.  My every need cannot be met in others.  Only a human can meet the needs of another human. They cannot be found in myself and they cannot be found in anyone else save the Perfect Person of Christ.  There is a reason He is described as our All in all.

Today, Christ met me right in all my neediness and validated my humanity.  He validated me even when I invalidated myself.  So in this moment, and every moment, I can be a needy human and I can rely on Him as my All in all.

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